Conversations with my baby

Nixie constantly amazes me at the things she does, the way she understands things and the words she says. She is only 22 months and already talks so much. She has been talking well since at least 18 months and talking in sentences for a couple of months now too. I love that I can have a conversation with her now and we understand each other (most of the time). This morning I asked her if she could say a rather difficult word, I'm trying to remember what it was now, oh yes - antibacterial - and she blew me away by actually saying the word correctly. It was soo sooo soooooo cute!

I remember distinctly when I realised Nixie understood more than I gave her credit for. She had just started walking so I think she must have been about 14 or 15 months. I was trying to get dinner cooked one afternoon and she was all over me and I was getting so frustrated at my inability to get anything done as she wanted to be picked up all the time and was continually tugging at my pants.
I turned to her and angrily said "GO AWAY" and pointed into the lounge. Next thing I know she toddles off to the lounge room with a sad little face. I got such a stab of sorrow in my heart at my actions that I immediately dropped what I was doing and went over to her to apologise to her and give her a cuddle. From then on in I was so much more careful with what I said. She knows!

So many times in the car she has mimicked something I have said and had me in fits of laughter.
She turned her little eyes on to mine in the rear view mirror a couple of months ago and said to me "Eyeballs are watching yooo-oou", and she says it with this gorgeous little sing song voice I nearly drove off the road laughing with her. 

Her little cheeky personality is really starting to shine through and I'm getting glimpses of who she is. She loves to make people laugh and will keep doing something or saying something if you laugh.

Just yesterday after placing her order at the coffee shop "babyccino please" the lady said she wouldn't be too long but just had to make someone a smoothie first. I said no worries only to have another little voice pipe up - "No worries", it certainly makes you smile :)
How much do little ones love their babyccinos huh! (and marshmallows) :-0

Here is a cute little video of Nixie saying grace before her dinner. She blew me away a couple of months ago when I sat down with her to say grace for her. I always say to her "Hold my hand and close your eyes while we say grace". I would then say grace and she would repeat "Amen" at the end after me. This time though - while I waited for her to hold my hand and close her eyes she jumped right in and said "Thank you Jesus". It was so special. Now she says nearly the whole lot, she just misses out the bit "please bless it to my body" but that will come - its a long sentence! Check it out:

xxoo

I am beautiful! You are beautiful!

I would not consider myself a beauty. If I was to come across something like this video I will link below then, I would probably go through the average door. 

Dove Choose Beautiful Women all over the world make a choice

Beauty is more than skin deep though and I know that true beauty comes from within. I am so conscious of the things I say and the way I act around my child as I do not want to assist in the unfortunately almost inevitable fact that Nixie will at some stage go through doubts of her own beauty and worth. If I could prevent this then I would - so I am doing my best to let her know how beautiful she is and also what true beauty is.

What is true beauty?

What matters is not your outward appearance - the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes - but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle gracious kind that God delights in. 
1 Peter 3:3-4 (MSG)

Inner beauty shines through and creates a beautiful person no matter the appearance.
How beautiful are people with smile lines? This shows an inner happiness that can not be faked! I hope to grow old with lots of smile lines! Outer beauty fades with age if that is all you have - cultivate inner beauty for eternity.

The power of words is incredible and I am so conscious of the things I say especially around little ears. Words create a reality. I tell Nixie she is beautiful, talented, smart, funny, lovable, gorgeous - and you know what - SHE IS! She has a lovely warm smile that draws you in and so many people comment to me about how cuddly she is. She will go up to you (when she gets to know you) and say"cuddles". The other day after leaving her in the creche for an hour while at the gym she turns to the carer and says "Mummy come back, mummy cuddles and kisses". Ohhhh melt my heart.

You are beautiful.

I am beautiful!

xxoo

She's Gonna Blow!

Every parent thinks their children are gifted right? Well - I am one of those parents who thinks their child is, haha. I have very little experience with children, I've never been one to baby sit other peoples kids and I had never changed a nappy before I had Nixie. I was wondering what kind of parent I would and am surprised at the parent I am.

The love you have for your child is incredible isn't it!

I would do anything for Nixie to ensure her safety and well being and if anything was ever to happen to her I think I would die (or at least want to die)...

The good things that I have discovered about being a parent is the unconditional love you have, the joy in life again and reliving your childhood; in a way. I have so much fun experiencing things through Nixie's eyes and I am learning to slow down with her and allow her to experience life in her way. But this has been a hard lesson to learn.

I have quite a temper I have discovered and I can be very impatient. Having a child has taught me so much about myself and helped me to realise that some things need to change. I was feeling like a terrible mother because I would lose my temper at my child when I should be extending her grace, it scared me in a way that I did not want Nixie to act like me at all. It was time to get some help as I just was not making the changes I so desperately wanted to make no matter how much I wanted it. In desperation I turned to the internet to see what other mums where doing and came across a great chat room where a wonderful book was recommended. I went straight out and bought it -"She's Gonna Blow" by Julie Ann Barnhill. BEST BOOK EVER!

After reading this book I immediately didn't feel alone anymore in my struggles and I started making the changes I needed - the thing I am finding that helps the most is dedicating time to God EVERY DAY - spending time reading God's word and talking with Him is helping me get my attitude right and my priorities in the right order. Gosh I am still struggling with keeping my cool but I am well on my way to being a better mum.

I had the best child hood growing up with amazing loving parents who where actually quite strict with me and my brother but I never remember being scared of them with the discipline we received and that is my hope with Nixie and the other kids we hope to have. #2 is on the way and I pray every day for this baby's safety and health.

On a funny side note - this is how we let everyone know Nixie was going to be a big sister:

Its going to be an amazing Christmas and summer with a new little bubba and making our family a family of 4!

Ok - time for me to do some things with the remaining time of Nixie's day nap, thank goodness she still has this nap 75% of the time :)

xxoo

Its been a long time...

... since I've blogged!

I have been reading quite a few mummy blogs since having a baby (nearly 2 years ago now) and we are now 4 months into the next pregnancy. Everytime I read the mummy blogs I regret that I have not started a blog of my own to record things - funny moments, pictures, events, things kids say, things kids do and just general things to remind me of what I have done and what has worked vs what has not worked etc etc. I have a brain like a sieve and struggle to remember things and I DON'T want to forget the early years of having kids especially with #2 on the way and knowing how much busier life is soon to become.

So - without further ado - I shall introduce my first born, the stealer of my heart - Nixie Eve :)

Nixie is such a joy! I can not imagine, and would hate to think of, life without this gorgeous little girl. 

Being a mum has taught me so much about life in general, about myself, relationships, how I deal with things, how to be a lover of life again and be spontaneous.

I have been stretched and pulled in ways I never thought and I have cried, yelled, been angry (angrier than I have known how to deal with) but also so happy, content, loved, I've laughed till I have cried some days...

Hmmm - right now there is a little voice coming from the bedroom "mummy cuddles, mummy cuddles..." Its 845pm... she has been in bed since 7pm but happily talking quietly till now. The talking is getting louder and so is the "mummy cuddles"...

Now I have a teething sleepy toddler on my lap while I type as she is not happy. I am trying to just go with things more these days, don't stress the small stuff so much. My plans frequently go out the window these days as well as things I want to do because I have this little human who changes things ALL the time, haha. Don't stress the small stuff. I appreciate the cuddles and the fact she wants so many and I wont deny them to her as I know that someday she wont be as cuddly or want so many, that will be a terrible day!

Well, this post is getting cut short, probably a good thing as I can ramble some days! 

I'm off to bed with my little cuddle monster as I highly doubt she will go to sleep without some serious cuddles tonight.

xxoo